so where's my moral parallel?....
Yorkshire born, Yorkshire bred, Strong in the head and good in bed ;)

I'm 5ft 9 but never feel tall

I'm a model- like models used to be- think Cindy Crawford and Christy Turlington with Gia's sensitivity and Janice Dickinson's acid tongue.

I'm a published writer and have a degree.

I want to be something and love like i am unfraid of being hurt. I shield myself a little too much.

I don't follow a theme at all as this is just for me.

This is my personal blog-and kinda secret!

a daydream believer and a homecoming queen.
archive rss ask theme
15:18
fancies a day in london, before the fucking olympics put the whole city on red alert.I always have so much there. camden is the funnest place on earth, home of one the funnest, most hedonistic singers the world i ever had. great match :)

miss both.

camden in summer = unbeatable

need!

plan for next pay day.

who’s with me?

15:16
you’ll never get my mind right…we’re two ships passing in the night,in the night…..
15:10
wants to write what i really feel,think,know but it’s offensive.maybe….
15:07 ‘cause it’s me and mr jones….
14:54
things are moving too fast. hoping to find ways to be better than my worst.

my head’s throbbing, i can’t think of why. what’s behind all this burning?

is it my thoughts or the sun?

18:13
we’ll take manhattan is on the tv in the background. the guy who played bailey was scrumptious but karen gillian? not beautiful enough and far too tall to be shrimps. what made jean so different was she was 5ft 7 and like a tiny fine boned doll. not piggy faced. cruel but true.

gorgeous, and very like bailey.

i’ve been to new york, under the same circumstances. i was alone,tho. i lived there in chelsea, in a building with tiny narrow staircases where the heat rising nearly knocked me out when i arrived there, an exhausted teenager in august 2005.

Manhattan: it is cruel at times, but it is the most breathtaking sight on earth to see that manhattan skyline, that you will come to love, looming over your yellow taxi over the brooklyn bridge.
you will cry. you will be dwarfed in every sense.
you’ll also find people in this city will share food with you and will help you-i was there two days when i met matt, an insistant floridian who followed me around chelsea. i learnt from matt american men are not like british men-they’re very into the main chance,which is useful lesson to learn early on in that city.it was gay jake who i met later that day and saw me sat in a courtyard near his kitchen and came up behind me on the bench ‘would you like some pasta,sweetie?’

everyone should live in new york and i intend to return as soon as i’m sorted

18:00
17:56
fuck it. i’m gonna listen to gang of four.

a market of the senses….

17:53
i hate myself when i’m snappy with people i love. i think when i get angry, it’s because things i dislike about myself, when i’m tired, get reflected in them. it’s just self hatred that ever makes me be mean. i just wish i was better. a better person.not so broken,fragmented.comfortable with it all. that’d be so good. i love my mum so much and i just feel such a love for her when i speak to her, beyond all. it just makes me realise how bad i am. i need to be a better person, for myself, my sanity and future and for my mum. she deserves one shining light. i’m just in the dark, mostly.walking alone but battling on. all i can do.
17:43
i could be here and now. i would be, i should be, better how? i coulda been one of these things first

i coulda been your pillow, coulda been your door.

shoulda stayed beside you, shoulda stayed for more

a whole long life time, coulda been the end.

coulda been one of these things first